The sort-of top 15….

This isn’t a list of great literary novels of our time. This is a list of books that I really love to read. I know a lot of them aren’t deep, meaningful, symbolic, whatever. I don’t care! They’re entertaining, emotional, suspenseful, and that’s what matters to me. Screw you James Joyce!


Dead last. The Notebook by Nicholas Sparks – I read it in Italy. It was left in Italy. I feel bad for Italy.

Second to dead last. Next by Michael Crichton – I warned Moon not to read it, but he did anyways. I’m sure he’ll regret it for the rest of his life.

Third to dead last. Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man by James Joyce – seriously, a textbook of a novel. I appreciate the work that went into making this book (probably a billion times more than the Notebook) which is why it’s not dead last. But it hurts me to read it. It’s like reading cardboard. It’s full of unemotional, detached characters who I really couldn’t care less about what happens to them.

12. The Valdemar series by Mercedes Lackey – probably doesn’t deserve a place on this list, but I’m giving it one anyways. I don’t recommend that anyone over the age of 14 read these books.

11. The Westing Game by Ellen Raskin – a fabulous murder mystery book for kids.

10. The World According to Garp by John Irving – it’s funny, it’s heart-wrenching, it’s bizarre. It’s John Irving at his peak.

9. The Long Walk by Stephen King* - One thing I love about King’s books is he leaves some of them open-ended. You don’t REALLY know what’s going to happen to the characters. For me it makes the story keep going, long after the book is done. You can wonder about what happened next, come up with your own theories, relish it for a bit longer (kind of like garlic).

8. Ten Little Indians by Agatha Christie – the definition of suspenseful. I couldn’t sleep until I found out what happened. I always had this weird thought in my head that Agatha Christie was Alfred Hitchcock’s pseudonym for literature

7. The Harry Potter series by JK Rowling – yeah, so they’re children’s books. I still love ‘em!

6. The Stand by Stephen King* - I judge all post-apocalyptic books by this high standard. It’s epic, which in my opinion is the best kind of story you can get.

5. A Prayer for Owen Meany by John Irving – an all-around great, which also gave me a new appreciation for armadillos.

4. Armor by John Steakley* - I can’t come up with a quip that can summarize how I feel about this book. It’s a great stand-alone book.

3. Ender’s Game by Orson Scott Card* - It’s one of those books that sticks with you, whether you read it once or a hundred times. Truly inventive and insightful.

2. The Redwall series by Brian Jacques – C’mon! It’s Redwall! It’s got mice and badgers at war against rats and weasels and foxes! Brian Jacques may be personally responsible for my love of small woodland critters (except the South Park Christmas critters, those are fucked up).

1. The George RR Martin series, A Song of Ice and Fire* - the series hasn’t even finished yet, but I can’t stop thinking about them… talking about them… reading them over and over. Thankfully there are groups for this sort of lunacy.

* denotes books/series that were recommended by the Wolf. The man picks winners. He should start a club, like Oprah.